Profiles of Resilience #188

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

I consider myself a success when I say goodbye to my patients. When they no longer need to come and see me any longer, almost all of my patients get better and we say goodbye and and that is a good end.

Smith Galtney:

This was a collective experience. It wasn't just about dying and surviving. It was about living.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

This is Dr. Lisa Belisle and you are listening to Love Maine Radio Show 188 Profiles of Resilience airing for the first time on Sunday, April 19, 2015. AIDS and HIV are very different entities than they once were. No longer an infection that leads inevitably to death. The human Immunodeficiency virus and acquired Immunodeficiency syndrome can be managed with long term medications. Today we speak with infectious disease specialist Dr. Thomas Courtney about the evolution of AIDS and HIV in Maine. We also speak with Smith Galtney who created Seeing Profiles of Resilience, a collaborative photography project with the Franny Peay House. Thank you for joining us. Here on Love Maine Radio. We like to think about the impact of illness on community wellness. This is a subject that I know that our next guest has quite a lot to say about. This is Dr. Thomas Courtney, who is the Chief of Infectious Disease at Southern Maine Healthcare. He is also the president of the medical staff at SMHC. Raised in Massachusetts and New Hampshire, Dr. Courtney now resides in Saco, having practiced medicine in the area since 1988. He joined Frannie Peabody Center's Board of Directors in July of 2012. Thanks so much for coming in and being with us.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

My pleasure.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Dr. Courtney. Infectious disease is something that not everybody understands all that well. I mean, we know it could be anything from chickenpox to measles, but recently AIDS. Or maybe recently the last 30 years, maybe. AIDS and HIV have become A pretty important part of our society. And it's also. It's continued to evolve. Tell me what it was like when you first started practicing to now as to how we all viewed aids.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

The field of infectious diseases is indeed quite broad. I might go back to when I started medical school in the early 1980s, because that's when HIV became a recognized disease. And I had the wonderful opportunity at the University of Texas Medical center at Houston witnessing the evolution of HIV AIDS in. In medical practice. And I've grown up with it. So it is a wonderful vantage point to see where we were at a time in a disease that uniformly was fatal to a disease now that is uniformly not fatal. And so it's been a very exciting journey to see that change. Over time, the tools that we now have with medications and medication regimens have become far more tolerable than they were in the late 1980s. Far more tolerable and far more effective. So it has been a great journey.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I guess as you're talking about your own training, I'm thinking about where I was in the 1980s and I was in high school, and we were doing reports on this new disease that I'm not even sure everybody was calling AIDS at that point. And we all thought it maybe came from Africa or. And it seemed very scary because everybody was dying of it. And it almost reminds me of what's going on now with infectious diseases like Ebola. Do you think that the diseases we're seeing now are going to have a similar evolution, or is that something that. Is it just too difficult to compare them?

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

No, I think that there is some comparison, but they definitely are not apples to apples. Looking at hiv, this was a disease that was initially very hard to make a diagnosis. Diagnosis hard to understand what was going on. And it took many years to understand the virus that causes hiv. Aids different also from a disease like Ebola in that untreated, it takes a decade or more for a person to die from the illness, whereas in Ebola, you either die quickly or you recover from the disease. So certainly a different sort of disease process, I guess, in the. Looking at Ebola, where we have to act quickly and make sure that we have all the proper support to see a person through the illness. It takes a tremendous amount of resources at the very onset of the illness. HIV is a silent disease in many respects, where many of those who have the illness are not aware of it. We can be walking around in the. You know, walking around not knowing that we have the illness. And the only way to know for sure is by testing.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I'm remembering when I was a resident in the mid-90s, and at that point there was still a stigma attached to HIV testing. There's all kinds of information out there about privacy laws and HIV testing, and I think it has become less stigmatized. But I think there still is. There is still something very scary about HIV aids.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Well, you know, a lot of it has to do with what the education about the illness, when people were quite obviously ill and dying from the disease, that we were all afraid of it and afraid of acquiring it. In some ways that has subsided because I go back to my last statement that we don't know who has HIV aids. There was a recent conversation I had with somebody at the Salt Institute. There was a nice photographic view of. Of how HIV was affecting different people in the state of Maine. And a person came up. I was one of those pictures because I am a board member at Franny Peabody Center. And this individual was saying to me that, do all of these people have HIV aids? And they said, oh, I know you don't have hivaids. And I said, how do you know I don't have hivaids? Did I? And he kind of sat back again and I didn't tell him because it wasn't important that anybody could have HIV aids. And we just don't know. So in a way, the illness has become very silent, that we don't think about it, because the medications that people take make them well, and they are active community members. They are fully productive. And HIV has become a chronic illness, not unlike diabetes or some other chronic disease that can be well controlled with medications.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

What must it be like? And I'm asking you to guess. So I don't even know if you know the answer to this, but I think about the generation of men, and to a lesser extent women who lost partners, friends to HIV and AIDS back when we weren't able to treat it well. I'm wondering what it must be like to be living now, seeing all this availability of medicine and resources and people living with this, to know that all of these people died.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Well, that's true. That's the nature of medicine. We learn things over time and we're better at taking care of illnesses, allowing people to live longer. Sad for the losses that have been there. The only benefit is that it was all those losses that really demanded the research into the illness, demanded the development of new drugs to come with it. So those lives were in. The loss of those lives were by no means meaningless. Very, very important. That got the Drug industry and the medical community out there to find how to take care of this illness. And they've done a fantastic job.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Do you think that in some ways the HIV AIDS problem actually created maybe a more positive way for people who had been marginalized before, maybe people who were gay, for example, a more positive way for them to be out in the community?

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Certainly the communities of people that have come together, involved in the care of hiv, in particular the LGBT community, who have rallied together and provided support, have advanced that principle you're speaking of well over time. And when it does become more common to know that people with HIV are in the community, they are interacting with us daily, even though we don't know it, but also put a positive face on an illness. And the great amount of talent that people with HIV AIDS are able to contribute and that I personally see a lot and witness the great contributions the color to the world that the HIV AIDS community brings.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Tell me about your work with the Frannie Peabody House. I understand that this is an organization that has also evolved over time. From early on, I believe there was more work that was being done with in house care of patients, more like a hospice model. And now it's really providing resources and connections for people who are working and living in the world today. How does that look to you?

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Well, Franny Peabody had to change over time. It was established by Frannie Peabody and her son who had HIV AIDS and ultimately passed from that disease. And she provided a resource, a place where people could come with the intent to die with the illness. And that became an outdated model when people stopped dying of hiv and it doesn't happen any longer. If people don't want to die of the illness, they wish to take care of their medications, they don't die from this illness any longer. They die from heart disease or cancer or something else that we all have to face in our later lives. So Franny Peabody gave up that model of being directly caring for people with advanced HIV to a more forward looking model trying to identify people early in the course of their illness so they can be put on appropriate medications. They have helped people who are in need, sociology, economic need, or challenged in some other manner, providing that individual to interface with to help them get the things they need to survive, whether that is food or housing or medication or testing or transportation. So many different facets to Frannie B. Buddy center and they do a fantastic job. I have interacted with the caseworkers at Frannie Peabody center for many years as they would come into my office with patients bringing them there oftentimes coming into the appointment with them so that they can help interpret and what's going on there in those who needed it and that this was clearly a wonderful organization. So I was asked to become a member two, three years ago and I thought a wonderful opportunity for me to contribute to that effort. So these are dedicated people who try very hard on sometimes limited budget to accomplish a tremendous amount and just thank God that they're there. They do a great job.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

we at LoveMaine Radio enjoy a special relationship with Apothecary By Design. This photography exhibit will be available from March 27 to April 24 at 75 Market street, the offices and Maine Magazine. We hope you take the time to stop by. Infectious disease is a very, as we said when we started this whole conversation, it's been an evolving specialty. At some point you had to make that decision. You had to decide, I'm going to be an infectious disease specialist. And we're lucky because in Maine we have some very good infectious disease specialists, but there aren't a lot of you. Why did you decide that this was going to be your path?

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

I like talking about this because in my training at UT Medical School in Houston, there were some tremendous infectious diseases specialists there. And when leaving medical school, you don't necessarily know exactly where you're going to be. But as an internist coming to Maine, to Maine Medical center where I did my internship in residency, and then again meeting such well qualified doctors who love the field of infectious diseases and seeing how it inspires them, seeing how we can make a tremendous difference in the lives of people. Idaho infectious diseases is in some ways different from a lot of other fields of medicine where it is often an acute problem, a problem that is here and now that needs to be treated. And so I consider myself a success when I say goodbye to my patients when they no longer need to come and see me any longer. And although I do have seen some HIV patients for 20 years, that almost all of my patients get Better and we say goodbye. And that is a good end.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

When I get to the point as a primary care doctor, as a family doctor, where I need to send somebody to an infectious disease specialist, it's either one of two things. One, something came up on a lab test that I was not expecting and I don't know how to deal with it. So can you please help me with this is I've checked all of these labs, I've checked all of these tests. This person still has all of these symptoms. Could it be infectious? And can you help me rule this out? That's kind of an interesting. In one you have to be kind of the specialist. In one, you have to be the detective specialist. That's an interesting set of skills to need.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Absolutely. That's the beauty of having such a broad education in internal medicine. So being aware of all the other possibilities that exist for a complaint that comes in and with a narrower vision that it would be easy to attribute a certain complaint to something or this illness or that illness, that when you can see it in a broader perspective, you can take a look at laboratories and the presenting complaints that people have in the exam that you do on them and tell them sometimes this is not an infection that is causing you. But I think there might be a problem here. I think that sometimes it comes down to mental illness, to depression and anxiety that people have about their well being and getting them to see the proper professional can make a big difference in their lives or, or there might be a medical reason for their other complaints. And being able to refer them to the proper specialist is an important part of that.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

John, it is an interesting quandary because by the time you see people, many people, they've already seen, they've seen me, they've seen maybe an orthopedic doctor, they've maybe seen a joint specialist, a rheumatologist, they've seen lots of other people. So by that time they probably are fairly frustrated.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Oftentimes that is true and you need to deal with that. I would say that in the field of infectious diseases, thankfully it's not always that way, that more often than not we do have a pretty clear and convincing diagnosis and can set about to treating that particular problem. But there are chronic illnesses that people have that become much more frustrating, especially when we can't attach a specific diagnosis to that.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I'm enjoying this conversation because I think that the older that I get, the longer I've been in medicine, the more history I have behind me, the more I've actually participated in the history of medicine. And I think sometimes we would all do well, no matter what our age, to have some sort of historical perspective on medicine and to understand why we are vaccinating kids. You know, what happens when we don't vaccinate our children or what happens when you have a disease like hiv, AIDS that hasn't really been well defined, we don't know how to treat it and how it can evolve over time. I think this is a really important thing for people to always be aware of, just that things do evolve and there are sometimes very good reasons for why things are being done now.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Yes.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Based on the past.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

You know, there are a lot of illnesses that we don't see in the United States anymore. Take for example, malaria. Malaria used to be endemic in the United States. And I heard a nice bit on NPR Radio about yellow fever yesterday in the area of Missouri and that these are illnesses that we've been able to get rid of. And so we don't have any real sense of how dangerous these illness that still exists in other countries in Africa and South America and whatnot, and the tremendous effect that it has, particularly on children. Malaria, for example, and the half million or more lives that are lost a year to this disease and the good work by the Gates foundation to try to figure this out and provide ways to prevent malaria in children and vaccines that work well, I think maybe in some other countries there's far more aware of all the problems that can exist that we don't see any longer in the United States, but still are issues. And when you travel another part of our business through Southern Maine Healthcare Travel. Well, we do see people before they travel to various countries and are able to provide them with the appropriate immunizations and medications to prevent illness in their travels.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I'm assuming that people who are interested in learning more about travel medicine, hiv, aids, the work you do with infectious disease or Southern Maine healthcare can go to the Southern Maine Healthcare website.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Yeah, absolutely.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

And also can Google the Frannie Peabody Center's website as well.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Yes.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

We've been speaking with Dr. Thomas Courtney, who is the chief of infectious diseases at Southern Maine Healthcare and also president of the medical staff and on the board of directors with the Frannie Peabody Center. It's really been a pleasure to speak with you about all the work that you're doing and keep it up.

Dr. Thomas Courtney:

Thank you very much. I appreciate it. Our conversation.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

As a physician and small business owner, I rely on Marcy Booth from Booth Main to help me with my own business and to help me live my own life fully. Here are a few thoughts from Marcy when was the last time you took a break from what you were doing, from the work that was piled up on your desk and just looked up? I know that during the course of my days, I often forget to take a moment or two to just breathe, look up at the sky and dream. Terrible that I have to remind myself to breathe. But when I do, I feel energized. Because in those moments, I'm able to let go of the daily grind and think more about what I want to accomplish, how I want my business to grow. Sometimes those are the aha moments. If we all took a few moments out each day to stop what we were doing and dream a little about our business futures, not only would we feel a great sense of calm, but we may come to realize that these dreams can, in fact, come true. I'm Marcie Booth. Let's talk about the changes you need. Boothmaine.com

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I always enjoy spending time speaking with people that I have some sort of history with that I've met before. Today I'm speaking with Smith Galtney, who I've known for a few years off and on. He is a recent graduate of the General Studies program at the International center for Photography. He also studied photography at the Salt Institute for Documentary Studies in Portland. His recent exhibition, Seeing Profiles of Resilience, is on display at Maine Magazine's offices in Portland through the end of April. It's really great to see you again.

Smith Galtney:

Great to see you, Lisa.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I think that we first met at a baby shower.

Smith Galtney:

We did.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

So that was and I think that child is somewhere around 2ish. So this must have been like 2 1/2ish three years ago.

Smith Galtney:

Yes. Cleo, daughter of Rebecca Falzano Yes, I remember that very, very well.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Yes. And you were telling me at that time, I think I met both you and your partner and you were telling me about your experiences in Raymond, what it was like to move from New York City to Raymond, Maine, which it sounds like it was pretty great at the time and you still feel pretty great about it, but that was a big shift for you.

Smith Galtney:

It's fantastic now, and I completely consider Raymond to be my home. I can easily imagine living there for the rest of my life. The first year, however, Was horrible. Was absolutely horrible. I had lived in New York City for 20 years. He'd lived there for 10. And we both were pushing 40, and our neighbors were getting a lot younger and a lot louder. And suddenly I had become that older neighbor that was just like, keep it down, keep it down. And, like, usually whenever people did that to me when I was in my 20s, the first thing I would yell was, like, if you don't like it, get out of New York. And as I was banging on the wall, I was like, oh, my God, I've got to get out of New York. And luckily, we had bought a place in Raymond a couple of years before that. My sister's husband's family has had a house on Panther Pond in Raymond for decades and decades. And one weekend we went up to visit them, and it was just a total. I mean, there was something about it. Like, it just clicked. We had been looking at places in upstate New York and nothing really. We kind of didn't like. The idea of, you know, the benefit was that it was maybe an hour and a half, two hours, two hours outside of where, you know, away from where we lived. But then there was that idea of getting on a train with the exact same people, all these New Yorkers, and then suddenly being amongst trees, but in the same kind of New York state of mind, there was something remote and just completely remote almost doesn't. I don't know. I don't like the way that sounds. But there was just something very, like, different about Maine and just so not, like what I'd come to really sort of loathe over 20 years of living in New York. So. Yeah, but the first year was awful. It was terrible. It was. You know, people warned me. You know, they were like, okay, this is going to be a serious, like, transition here. You know, are you prepared for this? And we were both a little bit like, oh, you know, we'll be fine, we'll be fine. You know, we'll just figure it out as we go along. Because I guess one thing that we didn't really want to do was go live. You know, New York kind of spoils you as far as cities go. Like, we didn't really want to go live in Boston or even Chicago, because, I mean, as far as I'm concerned, New York is, like, the greatest city in the world. I mean, even we were lucky enough to take a trip to Sydney once. And even in Sydney, I was looking around like, well, it's not really New York, you know, so the idea of, like, living in Sort of a lesser version of New York was not appealing. And the idea of just going somewhere that was completely different from it was. Felt like kind of the only way to really go about anything. So. But it was awful. It was awful. We lived these sort of parallel lives in New York that I wasn't really aware of how parallel they were. John works in finance, so he would. You know, there would be long stretches where he would come home and go to work after. And before I had gotten up, I had gone. I don't know if that makes any sense, but, like, I would go to bed and then wake up, and he would have come home and gone to work, you know, like. So I would kind of wake up and I'd be like, I sense that someone or something has been here, you know, like. But I just wouldn't see him. And then, you know, really, our only day to spend together was, like, Saturdays, you know, because he would work on Sundays. And, like, we went from this sort of parallel life to, like, literally living on top of each other and not having any friends and spending every minute of every day together. It would get to the point where the end of a day would come and we'd be like, well, oh, well, you know, we need some things from Hannaford. And I'd be like, oh, I'd go get them. I'd go get them. And then he'd be like, no, let me go get them. And, like, he'd be like, maybe we should go together. And I'd be like, no, I don't. I don't. I don't know how to say this, but I just. I just need to be alone. Like, don't come. You know, and it was tough because I didn't. You know, living in New York, I didn't realize how many opportunities I had just to be like, oh, I'm gonna go for a walk, or I'm just gonna go to the Barnes and Noble and look around without actually, you know. And the reason I did that was because I need a little. But I didn't actually have to be so blunt and be like, I need space, you know? But when suddenly we were living in this town that in the off season is about 4,000 people, and neither of us. I mean, that was the other thing was that we would sit there and be like, oh, we need to find friends. And, you know, we were almost 40, and I couldn't even remember a time that I had been at a point where I needed to, like, go out and find friends. Like, I mean, you know, I thought Maybe, maybe college. But in college they put me in a dormitory and like gave me a roommate. And you were living in a hall with a bunch of people. So I mean, you know, friendships just kind of happened. And so I was like, I mean, we actually googled how to make friends because I did it as a joke. Like, I was like, well, because I mean, my partner is even less like outgoing than I am. And so I actually googled how to find friends. And then we found this. Like, I think it was like, what is it, like about.com or something like that. Like it was this list of like, you know, go to social functions, you know, if you're in the market, say hello to someone. And we were like reading it and we were almost like kind of fascinating. We were like, this is actually really helpful, you know.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Is this why I met you at that baby shower?

Smith Galtney:

Yes.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

That you were looking for friends?

Smith Galtney:

We were looking for. We actually, at the baby shower, we had made a great deal of progress. The first. And you know, it's funny, Rebecca Falzano, the, you know, managing editor of Maine Home and Design, she was the first person who I had. I mean, when we came up here in Maine in the summer, you know, I had my sister here and my brother in law, they're kids. So it was like we had like this, you know, couple months buffer time of like Maine as we knew it, which was summer and, you know, and people and fires outside and good times. And then, you know, like in the middle of August, suddenly, like my sister left. And then it was just us and I was just like, you know, at night I'd be going to bed and looking at John like. And I was like, we're not leaving, are we? You know, we're here. And I also had to find work. And that's how I found Rebecca, because I started to kind of cold email people and looked at mastheads and social networked people and whatnot. And Rebecca responded. And so we actually met for a coffee. And I remember inviting she and her husband Steve this before they had Cleo, their baby, and invited them over for dinner. And we were so nervous, like all day before they arrived because, I mean, it was. This was like an early. This was like in March of 2010. And we had. So it was. We were just. We had been there, we had been in Maine about nine months and this was an entire fall and most of a winter of not really seeing anyone but each other. And, you know, our first Maine winner. And so, you know, and I remember like the doorbell rang and we were just like, we had never heard the doorbell ring before. Like, we were like, oh, my God, we have a doorbell. Like, you know, And, I mean, I still want to ask Rebecca, like, what we looked like when we opened the door, because I'm sure that we probably looked a little frightening because we were just like, hi. Like, come in, human beings. You know, I've heard about you people.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

I'm just. I'm laughing at almost everything that you're saying, because I think anyone who has moved to a new place, but specifically a more remote place like Maine, can relate.

Smith Galtney:

Yeah.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

You know, just this idea that you're out in the middle of nowhere, you have your one friend who is the guy that you live with.

Smith Galtney:

Right.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

And then you have to go out there and connect with other creatures. And it kind of does something interesting to your head.

Smith Galtney:

No, absolutely. It did something to my head, and it didn't do what I thought was gonna. It was gonna do. You know, I moved to New York. I went to NYU when I was 18 years years old, and I went to. You know, I basically went there because I was dying to go to New York City. But also I knew that I was gay. And I had heard that New York University was right in the heart of Greenwich Village. And judging from certain movies that I had seen at the time, I was like, oh, I think that that's kind of where it's all happening. So I kind of. I knew it was a good school and I didn't want to go to. You know, I grew up in New Orleans, so I didn't want to go to lsu. All my brothers and sisters went to Ole Miss and very fraternity oriented, that kind of scene. And I knew that really wasn't for me. So I did really want to get away. But I also kind of went to New York because I wanted to be gay, you know, And I felt that that was a place where I could do it. So I kind of didn't realize that I had spent, like, these 20 years of living in sort of this urban metropolitan bubble of feeling like. I mean, in a lot of ways, I did. You know, it opened up my mind to a lot of new experiences. I was able to come out. I was able to sort of live my adult life as a very open gay man. But I really, you know, I was also very protected in New York and in feeling like, oh, my mind is so open because, like, I'm this gay guy who's open to, like, these. You know, I'm so alternative, and I've been through all these alternative Experiences that, you know, in the process of going through that, like, my worldview was pretty slim as far as, like, say, people who lived in non urban settings in smaller towns. And so when we arrived in Raymond, I didn't realize how absolutely petrified I was of my neighbors. You know, I was expecting them to be judgmental. I was expecting them to be homophobic fundamentalists, like, you know, Christians, just. I was expecting them to just be like, we don't want you in this neighborhood, you know, and what happened was, is that they threw us a barbecue. They threw us up. They were basically like rolled out the welcome mat and they were like, welcome, guys. You know, it was like they pretty much put two and two together, you know, very quickly.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

And they didn't think you were just good friends?

Smith Galtney:

Well, a couple of people, like, I think thought we were brothers, which I always find very interesting, considering that we don't look anything alike. And why there would be these two brothers. I mean, it's not actually. I mean, I. At the time I was like, why would two brothers be living together like, you know, and buy a small little lake house together? But I've actually seen, you know, people down the. There's actually three brothers who live together down the road from us. So it's like since then I've been like, okay, well, you know, maybe it's possible. I mean, there was one time where, you know, at this barbecue where a guy across the street, you know, older guy, elderly guy, he shook John's hand and he said, oh, well, welcome. And then John said, oh, well. And John motioned to me and said, you know, this is Smith. And then he shook the older man, shook my hand, and then he just looked at us and went, oh, so you two live together? You know, And I was just kind of bracing myself sort of for like, okay, here it comes, here it comes. You know, and all he did was just go, like, you could see him turn it over in his brain. And then he just went, all right, you know, and that was that. And that's pretty much if I could like embody our experience in Maine at all. It's like. And I actually kind of feel like people in Maine have this sort of evolved sort of level of this kind of just totally like low key. Like, it's not even acceptance. It's just like they just kind of don't really care, like, you know, which is kind of really cool. It's. I mean, sometimes I find it annoying when people try to be overly accepting and be like, oh, you know, you should come over and we can watch, like, you know, Desperate Housewives together or something, you know, And I'm like, I don't like that show, you know, so. So it's just kind of nice when people are just like, okay, fine, I don't care. You know, this idea, you know, the gay thing aside, there was also this idea of me. And this was the worst part. Like, this was the part I wasn't expecting was this idea of me as a New Yorker, this heightened sense of self that I had as this culturally, you know, superior New Yorker, this person who had decided to venture to New York City and leave home and live there for so long. And I was on some sort of, you know, and I had decided to now, you know, leave New York because it was time for me to be elsewhere, you know, and, you know, I met a lot of people. The first dearest, dearest from, you know, friend I've made in Maine. She. You know, I became friends with her, and I said, oh, where are you from? Because, you know, in 20 years of living in New York City, that's what you ask. Because no one, you know, so few people in New York are from New York. And I said, where are you from? And she said, I'm from here. You know, she was like, I've been living in Raymond all my life. And I. You know, this is going to sound awful, but, like, you know, I. I'm pretty sure that, like, the look on my face was like, oh, I'm sorry. You know, and that's not something that. Like, in retrospect, that's not a reaction I'm proud of, but it's where I was coming from. And, you know, it was like. I think I. It was like, at the end of the first year, I was smacked in the face. Not. Which probably sounds a little dramatic, but it was just like, I was kind of blown away by the fact that, like, okay, wait a minute, wait a minute. Like, when did I become the most homophobic person I know? You know, everybody's been nothing but welcoming. And then, like, I am so full of myself. Like, I am. So I've got to get over this idea of who I think I am and just chill out and like. And not, like, be such. You know, I was a snob. And it was just that. That sort of wraps up the first year of just, like, this feeling of, like, okay, nobody's acting the way I thought that they were gonna be. I'm acting in a way that I never thought I was, so why don't I just spend some time like just, just kind of grounding myself and sort of getting situated here. And so, yeah, I feel like I didn't bring that to like a.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Well, it actually does for me because I have wondered since I knew that you were the one who shot the photography for Profiles of Resilience, I have wondered how it felt to be the gay man who was asked to do the photography exhibit on the HIV and AIDS project. As if somehow because you're a gay man, you have some heightened knowledge of this or. I just, I mean, I don't know, maybe it's. I don't know. I've wondered that.

Smith Galtney:

Though it did feel like a good fit. Donna Galluzzo from the Salt Institute for Documentary Studies got in touch with me and she said, you know, I think you'd be perfect for this. The best way for me to answer that, I would say would I think they were looking for someone to approach this subject in a way that wasn't maudlin, if that's not too overreaching of a word, that wasn't tugging too specifically at the heartstrings, wasn't too sentimental, stark. Someone who could possibly approach these people just as people and not as necessarily case subjects. I've certainly had friends who've. I've had an old boyfriend pass away. I've had friends who've lived with it since the early 80s who were some of the first people to get diagnosed and are absolutely qualified as long term survivors. So I would say maybe I have more a broader perspective about what this, about how living with HIV AIDS isn't just a condition. You know, I've lived and spent many times and have great relationships where it's like, I'm not constantly thinking like, oh, you know, you've got it and we need to spend time together. It's just, it's just, it's been around long enough that it's just sort of a part of life. And, you know, I always feel like I have to sort of be careful sometimes when I'm talking about this because we didn't, we were so careful to not use words like disease and illness and stuff and instead just plainly saying HIV aids, not referring to it as an epidemic or. I mean, it certainly had days when it was a death sentence and when it was, you know, not good news to receive. But it's been around long enough that it really. It's like everybody seems to know somebody who's had it or died from it or living with it. And unfortunately it's been around long enough and it's been treated effectively enough that now people are assuming that there's a cure for it and, and resorting, you know, regressing to, to older, you know, not necessarily practicing safe sex like they used to. So the alarming thing is since this show I've had two friends who've seroconverted, which is just disturbs me because I guess I feel like we've gotten to a. I don't know, I guess I feel like at this point in my life, I mean, I'm in my mid-40s now and I first came out when I first realized I was gay. You know, in my head when I was like, yeah, I probably think I'm gay was right when the first news items started to surface about it. So, you know, when I imagine the future, I kind of imagine like a cure and people not dealing with this anymore. And it's so it's a little weird like in the last few months to know that there's friends of mine who are still contacting it. So that's a little unsettling and why it makes me think like a show like this is important because, well, there are people on the show who live with it. They take medications and this is not necessarily something that you want. This is not necessarily something that you want to live with. It's not like, oh, I'll just take some Advil in the morning and it'll be fine. I mean, these are really intense medications they have and some of them are new and they can have side effects and long term effects that, you know, don't necessarily like. It's not something like, oh, you still want to be careful. You really, really still want to be careful.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

so what I'm hearing is that you took this when they asked you to be the photographer, you took this as entirely a good thing. That not only as a gay male, you had friends, people that you knew in your background that had HIV and aids, that you had that, but also you as a person. They were saying, smith, you have the wherewithal to present these people in a way that is more them, in a way that's less sort of our filter of what we believe people should look like when they have a chronic disease.

Smith Galtney:

Sure, sure. Yeah, I think so. I mean, one of the things certainly in the time I was studying at SALT was one of the greatest things. The best thing I learned in my photography class at SALT was that when you're photographing someone, it's very intimate. And this is gonna sound, like, really cheesy, but I noticed that, like, if I just showed up and started snapping pictures of someone, like, their pictures almost always sucked. And if I spent time with them and got to know them as people and then I said, oh, would you like to take some pictures? I always came back. And when I showed pictures in class, like, I didn't just respond to the pictures, but like, the people in the class who didn't necessarily know the difference between the different kinds of time I'd speak spent with them, but they immediately could see in the pictures that they were like, these are so much better. I like this person, you know, and there was one time where I was working with this one woman. I met her time and time and time again and I really still hadn't felt like, I know, like I had gotten to know her yet. And one time I hung out with her and we just had this really cool talk. And this is the part that sounds a little cheesy, but like, I actually. It was like. It was that similar feeling of like when you kind of fall in love with someone and you just sort of see the person and just like, suddenly I wasn't so obsessed with like, schoolwork and I gotta get her, I gotta get her, I gotta get her. And I just suddenly relax and I was like, I really like this woman. And so I started taking pictures. And then everybody was like, you know, these are great. And everybody really felt the same thing I was feeling. So I think Donna kind of knew I had had that experience in salt and so I was really able to sort of apply that to each of these subjects and not just make it a sob Story and coming from the other level, like not making it some, not putting them on a pedestal, like, you know, not putting them up and being like, oh, you're so, you're such an inspiration. Your story is so triumphant and I get so, so much from it. You know, the way I put it once was that, you know, I'm not going to put these people under a microscope and I'm not going to put them on a pedestal. It's like they're just people and it's just this sort of mundane kind of level of like living with HIV aids. Like just the kind of day to day of it. Not the, not the I was on my deathbed or I was leading the town and the AIDS walk, you know, uplifting kind of element that like people often, you know, attach, you know, attached to. Like for instance, there was this one guy named Jimmy who lives in Ogunquit and he, he's been living with it since like the early 90s. And you know, he had done a lot. I mean, his credentials were amazing. I mean, he's basically, basically like sort of one of the mayor. I mean, I know there's many mayors of Ogunquit I've met, like probably, I think like four of them. But he is definitely like a Pied Piper character in Ogunquid. He raises a ton of money for the AIDS walk. He's inspired many, many, you know, many men in that town of all ages with his frankness about, you know, his status and everything and just the life he leads. It was a pleasure to be in his company, to get to know him well. One thing he told me was that when he was first diagnosed, he immediately went into this mindset of I have to enjoy every day. The big picture plans were like, put those. That doesn't matter right now. What I'm going to do is sink my money into a motorcycle and I'm going to like ride around the country and you know, it's all day to day and it's going to be just like, you know, enjoying life while I have it. That was over 20 years ago. So now he's sitting here now in 2015, he is looking back and being like. And thinking, oh, but those big picture plans, like I never really. He never invested in a house. He didn't pursue his education like he wanted to. He didn't get to sort of have that big picture plan, didn't get to commit to it the way a lot of us do. So he does feel a little, you know, he did say he felt a Little cheated by that, but not bitter at all. Still a person who's just so happy to be here and just has an infectious kind of energy to him. But I never thought about that, was that it was like these people who just, anytime that they got a common cold, that they'd be like, oh, okay, well, maybe I shouldn't go to school. Maybe I shouldn't. Is that helpful?

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

It is helpful and it's helpful to hear these stories. I had the chance to look at the photographs that you took when they first were on display, I believe, at the Salt Institute. And I went around and looked at them again. What I liked about them is that there's not really a delineation. You don't have the people who look sick versus the people who look well versus the people that you think might have aids because they look like the sort of people who might have AIDS versus the people who you don't think that they would have AIDS because they don't look like the kind of people who would have aids. It's just a very, I don't know, non denominational. It's just here's a community. All of these people could be living next to you. They could be in your life and you don't even really know. And you specifically did not label this person has aids. This person is an AIDS doctor. This person worked at the Franny Peabody house. They are all just people.

Smith Galtney:

Yeah. When it came time to doing the text panels with the, you know, the text panels, you know, there's photos and then there's a text panels that, you know, basically is a short paragraph first person account of just, you know, first person quote from them detailing their experience. And we didn't, when it came time to put in their name, I was like, oh, should we include what town they're from or, you know, you know, what they do or whatever. And we were like, no, just put their names. And that seemed to be the right way to go because it really emphasized that this was a collective experience. And it wasn't just about. It wasn't just about dying and surviving. It was about living.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

Smith, do you have a website that people could go to to learn more about the work you're doing?

Smith Galtney:

Absolutely. Smithgaltney.com Smith, I'm glad that you were

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

able to come in and talk with me today. And it's good to hear some background, not only about your experience with working on Profiles of Resilience, but also your experience living in Raymond, especially that first year and coming to Maine from New York City. And as someone who has lived in Maine largely for the bulk of her life and gone away for a few years for education, I can relate to the story of the person who's been here the whole time. It's been good to talk to you and I appreciate the work you've done on this. We've been speaking with Smith Galtney. He's a recent graduate of the General Studies Program at the International center of Photography. He's also studied photography at the Salt Institute for Documentary Studies. I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot more of your work. Thank you, Smith.

Smith Galtney:

I certainly hope so. Thank you, Lisa, very much.

Dr. Lisa Belisle:

You have been listening to Lovemain radio show number 188, Profiles of Resilience. Our guests have included Dr. Thomas Courtney and Smith Galtney. For a preview of each week's show, sign up for our E Newsletter and like our LoveMain Radio Facebook page, follow me on Twitter and see my running travel, food and wellness photos as bountiful1 on Instagram. We'd love to hear from you, so please let us know what you think of lovemain Radio. We welcome your suggestions for future shows. Also let our sponsors know that you have heard about them here. We are privileged that they enable us to bring Lovemain radio to you each week. This is Dr. Lisa Belisle. I hope that you have enjoyed our Profiles of Resilience show. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your day. May you have a bountiful life.

Smith Galtney:

It. Sa.